Say what?

Have you ever had a conversation where you couldn't or didn't say anything because you kept thinking about the impact and/or consequences anything you say could have? Well, I've been going through that dilemma for a very long time now. This has sort of turned me away from interacting with anyone at all. I've become slightly paranoid. This kinda reminds me of a line from the movie "The Last Samurai", when that Japanese kid comes to Tom Cruise, when he's losing every fight with that other samurai, and says, "too many minds". Thats exactly what's happening to me. I have so many things going through my head when I'm talking to a person that I don't have the mental capacity to think of the conversation I'm having at the moment. Which in turn leads me to run out of things to say.


I still don't know what this type of disorder is called. I guess, I haven't come by this in my medical textbooks yet.

I swear, I tried so hard not to turn this into just another "emo" -blog but then again, I thought that writing about my emotional spasms is necessary 'cause its the product (as well as the essence) of all the things that are going through your mind. I'd say that its essential in psychotic studies, but thats just me. So here I am recording my delusional thoughts in an attempt to understand my own thinking. Haven't got too far, I'll tell you that.